Friday, December 12, 2014

F**king Christmas music...

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer illustrates the worst of humanity.

There are a number of Christmas songs that illustrate the worst of humanity, but "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" takes the cake with its gale-force shitstorm of pettiness. It's a song about bullying, discrimination, shallowness and opportunism. Nothing about the story shows any redeeming quality to it. It's like a committee of shitty people got together to create a nation founded on the principles of douchiness, and wrote the lyrics of Rudolph for their anthem.

And then there is... A case for The Grinch

I was listening to the song "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch," by Thurl Ravenscroft a while ago I noticed that the lyrics make the guy sound like an industrial-strength asshole. At 3-minutes long, the song contains a whopping 30 insults hurled towards The Grinch, or approximately 1.67 insults per 10 seconds. Holy shit! There are death metal songs that actively encourage kids to kill themselves, and even those don't come close to this rancorous shit-storm of a song. So why's he so heinous? Because he doesn't like noise. Yep, that's it. Oh no, not that! So without further ado, a case for The Grinch:

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